Are you there God? It’s Me, Kelly Michelle.

Ah, Judy Blume. I pity anyone who didn’t grow up with Blume as a pivotal voice during their adolescence. I remember there was always a certain mystery to her books. You had to be a certain grade to check the Margaret book out from the library. You know, they really had to protect our delicate, mushy brains from those evils of the world like books that made us think, cause really new ideas and pondering just have no place in the classroom. Or maybe it was to protect our sensibilities and dare not expose us to something that wasn’t “proper”. Hogwash. But I digress. Not sure why this book popped into my head today, but it did. I learned a lot from Blume’s books. A lot about life and a lot about myself.

Well today you are getting the distinct pleasure of learning a little more about me. I am a child of God. I should stop there. That should be it, end of story.   But my pride and arrogance want me to tell you more about myself, and sin is more fun, so here goes.

I am a mother, wife, daughter, sister, and friend.  I was born and raised in Houston, Texas and still live here.  I LOVE my town.  I always say I live in the best city, in the best state, in the greatest nation in the world.  Hyperbole much?  Well, when you’re from Houston you get to brag.  And speaking of bragging rights, I’m a fourth generation Houstonian, my kids fifth generation.  Is that really important?  No.  Is my family especially influential or prestigious? Not at all.  We’ve just been here awhile, at least on my mother’s side.  But when you’re from an international city full of recent immigrants (and by immigrants I mean people who move here internationally from places like Vietnam to the daily denizens of Californians that are moving here in droves), who are at the point where they are still measuring their time in our great community by the days, you do get some bragging rights for being a native. And once you get here, you never want to leave.  So, thanks to my great-grandparents, Grannie and Papa, for picking a great place to settle all those years ago.

Besides living in an amazing community, I am married to the most wonderful man.  I really don’t tell him that enough.  He puts up with all my bullshit.  I’m pretty sure St. Peter has his name on a list that lets him go to the front of the line like a Disney fastpass.  No waiting at the pearly gates for him.  We have been married for 14 years.  We’re high school sweethearts, so we do annoying things like also keep track of dating anniversaries (it’s May 18, 1996 in case you were wondering), so we’ve been together for 22 years.  Yes, we started dating when I was 7.  (No, I wasn’t actually a child bride, I’m 39, I just look like one.  Pardon me while I move away from the lightning….).  He’s also hilarious and pretty easy on the eyes.  Be jealous girls.  Oh, and he’s a bang up cook.  Now you’re legit jealous.

I have two boys that are seven and nine.  The English language doesn’t have adjectives with enough depth for me to adequately describe how smart, funny, and enjoyable they are.  I adore them and I love spending time with them.  They also annoy the hell out of me.  They.  Are.  Slobs.  Really loud slobs.  And they constantly fight.  About things like whether they are actually fighting or not.  But I guess we’ll keep them.

My oldest is the most interesting and unique person I have ever met.  I could talk to him for hours.  His sense of humor is second to none and he loves to read like me, and he loves sports, and drawing.  Today, on the way home from school we discussed the military tactics that the Ancient Roman Army used against the Celts and why they were not adequately prepared to meet the Romans on the battlefield – he’s 9!!!

My youngest is the sweetest, kindest child that gets excited about everything.  And I mean everything – from toilet bowl brushes, to what kind of soup I bought, to gymnastics, to going to the post office.  He has a singular focus that results in him doing whatever the hell he wants.  I always say I’m not really raising that one; I’m just managing the chaos and cleaning up the messes.  He’s not really naughty per se; thankfully, he is a generally well-behaved child.  But that kid is going to run something someday, I just hope it is a company and not a prison gang.

To round out the family we have two dogs.  They also annoy me, but I love them too.  My husband and I have amazing parents and we love all our siblings.  We’ll talk more about them another time.  For now, let’s just say this family tree is definitely of the tree NUT variety.

As far as professions go, I’m a Speech Language Pathologist (SLP).  You don’t have to pretend like you know what that is.  It’s okay.  99.73% of the world’s population doesn’t know what that is either.  I’ll do a little SLP PR for you sometime.  Just know that I work on an assessment team that evaluates preschoolers.  Yes.  Preschoolers.  I know, I’m a glutton for punishment.  Getting puked on, snotted on, pinched – all in a day’s work.  Some body fluid is going to end up on me on a daily basis – and yep I signed up for that!  But I love it.  I love children and I love children’s literature.

Well, that’s all for now.  This isn’t one of those put a pretty picture forward when things are actually falling apart around you and pretend it’s all fine thing. It hasn’t always been easy, I’ve faced hardships and struggles, everyone hasn’t always been healthy, everyone hasn’t always been getting along, but we muddle through.  What I do know is that life is good, and I really have no complaints.  There have always been laughs and joy so far along the way, so today I just choose to focus on that.

Well, that’s probably more than you care to know about me, but there it is.  Thanks for reading!